This week we read the last Torah portion in the book of Genesis. It includes a moment that is especially poignant: Jacob places his hands on the heads of his grandsons and tells them (and their father, Joseph) that in the future, Jewish parents will bless their own children by invoking their names, saying: “May God make you like Ephraim and Menasheh!”
It’s a beautiful blessing for these two young men, but it’s even more beautiful for their parents and grandparents. This is the definition of what we call in Yiddish, naches (a feeling of joy and satisfaction that comes from a deeply felt sense of pride). Imagine what it would mean to hear that future generations will bless their offspring by saying, “I hope my kids can be as great as yours were!”
Our parasha also includes Jacob’s parting words of blessing to each of his 12 sons.
Absent, however, is a reference to his daughter, Dinah. Amidst all of those words of blessing for Jacob’s sons and grandsons, our Torah includes none for Jacob’s daughters or granddaughters.
Later rabbinic tradition adds a blessing for our daughters which is traditionally shared on Friday evenings around the Shabbat dinner table: “May God make you like Sarah, Rebekkah, Rachel, and Leah!” While I wish that our Torah had included words of blessing from Jacob to Dinah, I’m grateful that our tradition, throughout the ages, has found a beautiful and elegant way to bless our daughters. It demonstrates how our Jewish practice evolves over time and encourages us to find ways to be more inclusive in our families and our communities.
My colleague Rabbi Laura Geller suggests a beautiful way of making the blessing more personal for our children. In her interpretation of the original blessing, she notes that Jacob says both to Ephraim and Menasheh and to future generations: “May God make you like Ephraim and Menasheh.” She writes: “Maybe we can understand Jacob’s blessing of his grandchildren this way: ‘Ephraim, may God help you become the best that Ephraim can be; Manasseh, may God help you become the best that Manasseh can be!’ Maybe we should fill in the names of our own children as we bless them. So I would say to my daughter: ‘Elana, may you be fully Elana!’ And to my son I would say: ‘Joshua, may you be fully Joshua!’ Or, in the words of the modern Jewish poet Marcia Falk: ‘Be who you are … and may you be blessed in all that you are’ (The Book of Blessings, 1996).”
Indeed, may we and the whole community be blessed in all that we are and all that we might become.
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Yoshi